The Big Picture

I like to look down when I run. I find it's protective and it keeps me relaxed. My eyes are usually down cast about 2 feet ahead of me and I focus on relaxing them, half closed.  When I look up and ahead I feel, somehow, overstimulated and overwhelmed. I see how far I have to go and I get irritated and slow down my pace out of frustration thinking I can't go further. Today I had a change in my belief of how I view the big picture of my running and exercise times. 

I decided to go running at dusk- my favorite time of day. I love to go to the Astoria Park's racetrack, running with the track's bright lights as the sun is setting. It's true I do love to be in front of bright lights- it reminds me of being on the stage. :) Today was the first time I went running in a few weeks.  It is my attempt to regain a running schedule. Tonight, I was feeling good and relaxed about my run and so I looked up. I enjoyed the other runners energy and the sky was so beautiful with the Robert F. Kennedy bridge over the expansive park. I felt different than I usually do. I didn't feel overwhelmed, but happy to be included in a workout shared by others working just as hard. It was nice to feel connected and I felt gratitude toward my surroundings and experience. Suddenly my run was about being involved and connected- not about how many laps I had left, or how tired I was. I tend to go through life always trying to get "there". Tonight I learned that letting go and enjoying my experience is far more enjoyable then stressing about how long it will take me and how much exertion I have to expend. My job is to enjoy what has been given to me in the present moment and to use it fully so I can be ready for the next. It reminds me of a quote I keep near and dear to my heart. "The choices I make in this moment will determine the freedom I have in the next. Make the right choices now in order to have the opportunity to choose in the future" ~Erwin Mcmanus

Good run.  

VEGAS PICS!!

Here are the pictures I promised!  It's been two weeks now since that the eventful weekend and I can confidently say I will always remember it as one of the best weekends of my life!  Good friends, good food, and wonderful going's-on!  I pretty much kept up my diet when I was there with exception of 2 glasses of wine at a special dinner and some wonderful bites of dessert for two meals (including creme brule at brunch!!!)  The rest of the time I stayed away from the chicken fingers, nachos, and yes, ladies and gentlemen...the free and endless alcohol.  No judgment on those who enjoyed these delicious beverages all weekend of course, but I knew that with my new lifestyle, the new understanding of my body, and how GREAT I was feeling, that it would immediately diminish had I participated.  I have uncovered many layers of health and gained such great insight over the past months, that I just wanted to continue feeling radiant.  I didn't want to deal with any maintenance work the week after such a wonderful trip.  I wanted to sail right through it.  So I honored my body and carefully picked out my treats.

I was the one who had chicken salads with no cheese, dressing on the side, requesting more chopped veggies with lemon and avocado. I opted for the green tea lattes and mini espresso's, always having a filled water bottle by my side.  I chose double portions of sauteed spinach and had fresh tartare and salmon salads.  This plate of goodness you see above was for a large group, but I enjoyed an equally large potion, passing on the mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, and the delicious stuffing in the lobster, but feasting on the green beans and.... the garnishes, yes I was that person.  I sneakily grabbed the kale-parsly bouquet, cut it up, and enjoyed it with my meat! I didn't care.  I knew I just needed the green stuff or I would go crazy!  If anyone said anything I just chalked it up to being a hungry rabbit and changed the subject.

Finally, the bikini pic I promised... ahhh, this will go in the photo books, and I am proud! :) 

So that's all folks!  I feel like I completed my diet with flying colors!  And I am keeping it up for the most part while adding in little things here and there.  What I am staying away from is all refined sugar, all dairy, and all gluten.  I will maintain this for quite sometime because my body is performing at it's best!

As I complete my health sessions with myself as my health coach I come away feeling more confident and secure in what my body needs. I have gotten to know myself in a very authentic way and have courted a more lasting relationship with myself.  

I have inspired some people to sign up for my program.  One of them has lost 15 lbs in 4 weeks.  These lbs. are lasting and not by any means have they come of because of any depravation diet. I encourage long lasting habits and if my clients take action in what I recommend the results are inevitable.

Who's next?  If you are intrigued even in the least bit, sign up for a free breakthrough consultation with me to see if we would work well together.  I would love to create a better health in YOU!!

                        Much love dear readers,

Jessica Burrows CHHC www.healthilluminated.com

Vegas

I am here in Sunshine-y Vegas and loving life! From bathing suits to sassy evening wear I have felt so confident in my body and have been really proud of my progress.  Let's break down my initial goals.


1. TO LOSE 10 LBS:
I never reached my goal of losing 10 lbs, but I did exceed my modified goal of 5 lbs. I lost 6.5 pounds.  Good enough, and I would venture to say perfect.  As I was dieting, I also lifted weights, ran, did pilates and rock climbed so I added some muscle to my body.
2. TO QUIT INDULGING IN MY CHEATING WHIMS AND BE OK WITH TELLING MYSELF NO:
While I wasn't perfect, I did really well with supporting my cravings.  I took out snacking and made sure each meal was complete. I also added a 4th meal to my regimen so I didn't have to struggle with feeling hungry. By doing this, I learned how to regulate my blood sugar so when I did become hungry I didn't feel shaky or deprived.  I also learned that strictly telling myself "no" does NOT work.  I had to make goals with finesse and look at the bigger picture, rather than my present cravings.
3. EXERCISE EVERYDAY:
By no means did I meet this goal, but I did get creative with how I got my body moving.  I tried new things like rock climbing (great workout) and I made sure to get in at least 20min. of running around my neighborhood when I needed to release steam or felt the need to snack.
4. EAT WHAT I KNOW IS HEALTHY AND SATISFYING TO ME AND MY BODY:
I met this goal with flying colors.  I always had a variety of veggies for me to snack on and had my blended vegetable soup everyday. I made organic beef burgers with collard greens when I needed protein, and got creative with the type of salads that I made for myself.  My body got used to this way of eating, that I began to crave these things daily and did not struggle with being tempted with an alternative.  I also had an end date to my specific regimen, so that kept me motivated.  I stayed focused when I was out to dinner with friends and modified dishes to fit my desires.
5. GAIN A CLEARER UNDERSTANDING OF MY CRAVINGS AND WHY I INDULGE IN THEM:
I believe that I will always struggle with anxiety eating.  However, I learned about relentless perseverance and constant tending to when I felt myself begin to test my boundaries. There are always reasons for my cravings, and usually they tend to be emotional.  These emotions need to be addressed and not stuffed.


This blog was created to support my goals and help me lose the unneeded weight that was on my body so I could feel totally confident, radiant, and healthy, therefore being my wonderful authentic self without using the excuse of hiding behind my circumstances and ineptitudes.  It's so easy to get caught up in the busyness of life and forget to create a personal foundation of health to use as your spring board.

I have a client's permission to disclose part of a conversation that we had.  She was absolutely livid that I should be 'whining' about losing a few lbs. when her end goal is to lose... a little bit more than that.  It put her in an impossible situation and she became pissed off that I should be so vain.  While I absolutely see her point of view, I have to say that we all go through different periods in our lives... all of us hit hardships. Like I have said in my past blogs, shedding weight permanently DOES NOT mean only pounds.  It's emotional and spiritual as well, and if a holistic POV is not taken there will be an imbalance.  So to put it lightly, I am "healing" from my imbalance. We came to the conclusion that every body is different as is our story. While I can superficially say "I gotta fit in a bikini", it goes deeper...as with all things.  

No matter how much weight you would like to lose, start with 5-10 lbs.  Reach that goal, re-asses, and then set a new goal.  Healthy actions recycle themselves- first in your body, and then to experiences around you and their affects on how you process them.  

I promised you a picture if I lost the weight... stay tuned ;)

Lunch Hour

I spent the most glorious day in the sun eating my lunch on the stoop.  Not only was I getting nutrients from my most amazing salad that I made, but I was getting nutrients from the sun as well!  I have been reading a lot about the benefits of vitamin D and how it boosts your mood, reduces risk of disease and inflammation, and builds strong bones.  Take advantage of the suns FREE benefits!! Get outside 10-30 min. a day with no sunscreen between the hours of 10-2.  Be aware of how sensitive your skin is.  You don't want to burn!!

Down and Dirty

It has been almost two weeks since I have placed myself on this diet. Eliminating snacks for this time period was a fabulous idea (practically speaking; otherwise it sucks), and since then I've cut down even more on the less nutritive foods and focused on highly quality nutrition. It has been thoroughly cleansing.  This pairing down, is in fact, happening naturally.  The more I integrate clean eating, the more my body craves it, so then I can surf the healthy spiral up and begin to let my BODY dictate what I should eat and not my emotions... and that includes my brain as it is directly connected with sugar cravings and emotional eating.

Nutrition feeds information to cells and those cells, being hard little workers, distribute all of the food's nutrients to your blood, bones, organs, tissues, brain, ending with your emotions.  If you constantly feed your body a variety of whole foods with a high amount of nutrients, your body will process that information with vigor, and health is recycled over and over again. Same works in the converse.  Feed your body even a little refined sugar, artificial sweetener, processed foodstuffs, high sodium, and dare I say it... caffeine... and you make your body work extra hard to distribute the appropriate digestive enzymes, minerals and hormones to complete it's cycle in the body... sometimes taking years to finally exit... if at all!

To be completely frank with you I struggle with certain extreme digestive complexities...ok, I am not going to be so frank about the deets, but the long and the short of it, in a beating-around-the-bush-fashion is that I am highly sugar sensitive and when I eat poorly (usually sugar, alcohol, my allergic foods, and too little veggies) bad bacteria takes over and I am left with some pretty frustrating side affects... including weight gain.  I have a poor genetic constitution, and while I fully believe that we have the power to change our genes, I think it takes a lifetime to do so.  The progression and it's benefits are immediate and rewarding and if it's consistent through your lifetime the benefits are priceless.  Less doctor visits, less disease, less allergies and colds, a lifetime-al happy demeanor ;), memory retention, higher energy, lower stress, and most important to me is renewing the next generation.

I'm not going to detail all that I have taken out of my diet because I would become overwhelmed. But. Here is my basic meal plan:

Salads:
Mixed greens
various chopped veggies
avocado
kim chi i (those who inquire about this gets extra points)

Blended veggie soup:
zucchini, green and yellow
onion, garlic
cabbage
brussels sprouts
collards
celery
fennel
cayenne

Kale sauteed in coconut oil with red pepper flakes topped with fresh herbs

and steamed anything.

I am having a small amount of good protein daily like wild canned tuna or organic chicken and sometimes I will have a serving of a gluten free whole grain.  But the main focus here is getting in as many veggies as a can.  That's where the optimal nutrition is.  I can just picture bright, happy, shiny working cells circulating in my body.  That makes me feel good. :)

What weight are you carrying?

I was sitting with a group of friends the other night for a late dinner wondering what the heck I was going to eat.  I had already eaten a light meal of sauteed bok choy and brown rice and I wasn't necessarily hungry. I knew that if I ordered a drink, I would be cheating on my diet.  Everyone else was getting a full meal and if I opted out of eating, I would be odd ball out.  This is a problem with me.  Fear of not fitting in.  Go figure, a 5'11' woman wishing she wouldn't stick out.  It's in my very nature and yet sometimes I want so badly to conform!

When I am my most authentic self, I am not caring what other people are thinking and my fear of judgement is diminished by how I use my integrity and the good choices I make.  Some people don't understand what it is like to struggle with insecurity (and I doff my hat to you) but I know first hand what it feels like to be frozen in place not knowing if the next word that comes out of my mouth is going to be the dumbest thing I have ever said.  I know the realities and practicalities of self-doubt and self consciousness but does that stop me?... In my teens, I read and reread The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom. It helped me through some of my worst moments and I still remind myself of it's wisdom.

As I become healthier, my soul and being is built up and through my pursuit to be a stronger person, I am able to overcome a lot of my battles.  The trick is to go through it.  In my experience, trying to find a short cut or attempting to move around the problem instead of wrestle with it head on only prolongs it's existence.  I believe certain things are given to you to work through so you can come out the other end a better person. If you put it aside, and repress what it's front of you there will be a continual build up and those same issues will revolve around and around you.  The hope is that once you actively start weeding through the issues and circumstances facing them head on, most will take care of themselves and fall away over time.

So when I ask, "what weight are you carrying" I don't want to know how many pounds too many you are.  I want to know what those things are in your life that you feel you can't battle.  More specifically, what relationships are not feeding you positively?, do you despise your job and feel creatively stuck?, What hurt do you carry around that you would like to unload, but can't see how to do it? That's the weight that I am talking about.

So, here is my coaching session with myself, my amazing health coach, who is helping me lose my weight.

Myself: I care so much what people think about me that I carry their opinions around with me and give up my voice.  In my most extreme moments I will let other dictate my actions as not to upset the energy around me.
Health Coach: So what weight are you holding on to?
Myself: Those people in my life who don't let me live authentically.  Mostly it's myself and my fear.  Others are just my mirror to my insecurities.  I hold back as a preventative measure.  But I am only coddling my fear.
Health Coach:  So what are you going to do about it?
Myself: I am going to follow my intuition and do things because they are authentically right for me.  I will set aside my fear of judgment and focus on loving myself and building myself up in order to be the giving, compassionate, fun, and intelligent person that I am.
Health Coach:  Do you believe you are all those things?
Myself: Yes and more!!!
Health Coach: Find the freedom of fitting out!
Myself: Ah, you are so wise...

By the way, at that dinner I was talking about, I chose to sip a club soda with a splash of cran and extra lime.  I got a few searing looks from the waiter, but other than that my friends thought nothing of it, and I had a lovely time. ;)

New Habits

I prepared a lovely little lunch for myself today. Cut up pepper, zucchini, celery, and cucumber to dip in hummus, followed by my favorite gluten free tortilla with a veggie basil filling. All made to-go, as I am always on the run. Before the subway came I got a chance to grab a bench and catch a second to take in the beautiful thunder clouds.  Suddenly, I smelled alluring deliciousness wafting from either side of me. New York bagel and cream cheese accompanied by a steaming cup of coffee- on either side of me!! Two against one. So I did the only sensible thing this healthy girl knows how. I started crunching on my celery...and dreamed of asking one of my bench buddies for a bite! Kidding. There was a time, however, when I would just get so angry at my gluten allergy and would give in to the indulgence of a bagel or croissant. I regretted it EVERY TIME. I became fatigued, irritable, and bloated. I mean so bloated that I looked 6 mo. prego! I would look down at my wheat baby in regret and long for the pre-bagel anger feeling instead of this new bodily transformation. Those days are thankfully over and I can gratefully accept my more healthier habits. I know how it makes me feel and the nutrients it provides for my body-  far superior to a bagel and cream cheese. So, ha, I win! 

By the way I am doing great on my diet. Almost no snacking, and eating only whole food meals. The occasional Gluten free tortilla included. It's made fresh from millet, brown rice and other magical ingredients that make it so tasty! It's gluten free in disguise!! I have been eating lots of salads, veggie juices, fish, chicken, quinoa, and sautéd leafy greens with new potatoes. I have lovingly slapped my hand every time I reach for a munchy food when I'm not hungry.  I just love to eat when I'm anxious or worried. I'm still not perfect, but I'm better. ;)